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I let myself MARINATE IN DESPAIR and REVEL IN ECSTATIC BLISS…it doesn’t get more real than this!

We are often taught that the key to a happy life is to see the positive in everything. “Hey, look at the bright side,” smile! and find gratitude no matter the situation. But SERIOUSLY, life is not always easy, and some days I don’t want to put on a inauthentic smile. For some reason or another, I just want to sit in the unhappy pool and bathe it in all day long.

Don’t get me wrong, I recognize the power in positive thinking and practicing a daily attitude of gratitude 🙂 I also strongly believe that everything happens for a reason and that all situations and people come into our life as a blessing.

We do the best we can, BUT, as humans, I think we sometimes forget that we can give ourselves permission to feel, and cut ourself some slack. To let our wounds cut deeper; to marinate in our loneliness. When we allow ourselves to feel our emotions, we are practising being present to what is; without trying to change it. We accept both sides of “our” coin; we recognize the partnership between shadow and light.

Society’s expectations have lead us to believe that we need to wake up happy, inspired and energized every single morning. And, if we don’t feel optimum in our physical body and thoughts, then there “must” be something wrong with us.

And so, we try to “fix” ourselves, thinking there is something wrong, something lacking.  We find a new diet to make our body more perfect and think this change will bring us joy…or we take a happy pill, do drugs or drink alcohol to unconsciously bury our feelings, emotions and stress, instead of simply being with it.

But just wait, and keep feeling…. Sometimes an hour, a day or weeks…However, we can only stay unhappy for so long until we decide to pull ourselves out of bed and go back out into the world with a new perspective.   We are hardwired for JOY, LOVE and COMPASSION- not anger, sadness or fear. Look at a child, they are a pure expression of Divine love and joy!

My invitation to you: Next time you feel overwhelmed or whatever it is you feel, allow space and stillness for these strong emotions to arise…simply observe, and then accept them with open arms. It is only in these moments of imbalance that we will know balance.

“This being human is a guest house. Every morning is a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor…Welcome and entertain them all. Treat each guest honorably. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.” ~Rumi 

Ok, now do a full 360 turn. Catch the wave! Ride the roller coaster! Feel yourself inspired, grounded, in the flow, in a state of ecstatic, creative joy. And again, truly allow yourself to feel it. Deeply experience these timeless highs. Now it’s time to give yourself permission to bathe in THIS pool for as long as it is present…a day, a weekend, a year…you deserve it! These feelings of bliss can be felt by spending time in nature, with friends, family, lovers or when we are feeling creative, present and in line with our purpose.

THEN there is “the next morning; the bliss hangover”… The high begins to dissolve, we feel empty again. And so we begin to search and yearn for what we feel is missing; we resist what we are feeling. We create our own suffering by trying to get back what we just had. We are so taken over by our emotions to notice that nothing is missing or lacking at all. It’s just another side of the same beautiful coin that we are.

My invitation to you:
Feel this yearning, this separation, but continue to remove the layers that block you from experiencing love, Divine Union. Continue to polish the mirror of your heart. It may not be easy to understand from the level of the mind, but we are not this body, nor these thoughts, emotions, patterns (this is a whole new topic!). We must commit to reminding ourselves on a daily basis through prayer, mediation, dance, creativity, art, time in nature, laughter… Everything is unfolding in Divine Timing and we are here as an expression of love and light.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

P.S Welcome to this brilliant human experience 🙂
Writing this post was inspired by life itself: moments of struggle and joy; and by the dear souls who touch my heart every day. I am so blessed to be surrounded by friends who are all so committed to living a life of consciousness and truth. You are all my teachers. Sharing this personal post on my blog was inspired by the courage of a friend of mine who recently shared her story and dance with depression publicly to help empower others and share her authenticity.